I still have my last paper tomorrow, Falsafah Islam. But I don't have any interest what so ever to cramp details about the history of Islamic philosophy, the scholars, the pioneers, Avicenna, Averroes, Suhrawardi, Mulla Sadra, no heart at all. I should be overjoyed to be surrounded by all this intellectual men. But my head and heart already decided to focus on the biggest F word that define me, Family.
I will go back to KL tomorrow, at exactly 1.55pm by flight. And I will arrive at the airport at 2.55pm. Maybe earlier because they are usually early anyways. Lya will pick me up, send me to the nearest train station, and I'll be back in KL by evening. Then, I'll start my journey to Kuantan with Abang E and meet more family members. I will then switch off my phone for the next 3 days.
Our family will be gathering at Balok Seaview Resot for our annual ABCB Family Day. Its family time! Can't wait to enjoy the company of many, laugh out loud, mini heart to heart sessions and most of all, PIRANHA feeding time! And I need to prepare myself getting told off, being bossed around and being the runner/babysitter/kuli/assistant/loudspeaker/photographer. Multi tasking righttt!
But right now, I'm sad. The only thing that keeps me going is the thought of being with my extended family. And the hope that this thing that is going on right now, will pass quickly. I hope it will. I don't know how to fix it. I don't know anymore. It wasn't like this before. Now its as if, there's no 'care' to try amending it.
But I still care. Or else I won't feel as if something is eating me up inside.
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