The title is also Katy Perry's song. Which I accidentally found while browsing through Jango during my boredom days as an intern at Bates. Back then the song sorta made my mind wander towards one person.
And now its wandering to that particular area again.
Big things are happening next year. Really big. So I may want to take the opportunity to sort out one important expect of my life. Maybe just maybe Ill be bold enough by then to actually say it. To make it known.
Sometimes I got balls. I hope it will grow again next year. Just for that particular opportunity.
I never thought we'll be more than friends
But here we are
Stuck in between
There's a line we have not erased
Because the steps we take made it vague
We're stuck in between
Because we have fallen in
Can't go back and won't move forth
I can feel the walls are closing in
Like quicksand, it swallowed us in
Now we're stuck in between
How do we get out of this
Do we start over
Do we wipe the slate clean
Or lets just be together
You and I
We're stuck in between
Kita tak tahu melangkah lagi
Setiap langkah kita adalah penerjunan
Kita relakan diri ditelan pasir jerlus
Kita benarkan diri disangkar terus
Aku tak tahu kamu
Tapi aku tanpa sedar terjerumus lahu
Aku tak pasti lagi aku
Sedang cuba kenali diri yang baru
Atau dalam diam sedang buang dulunya aku
Tak pernah diluah dengan kata
Tapi termeterai tak mampu wujud kita
Namun sempat juga tercipta ruang
Untuk rasa tanpa kita
P for perfect.
Best of all, the letter P is going to be pasted on the screens of cars I will be driving!
Say whatttt?! I passed my driving test! And will be getting my probational driving license next week! Alhamdulillah!
After 5 years from the first class, being pessimistic and pressured, FINALLY..... PASSED!
I am feeling that now. And I cant think of any friend that would just listen. And the most they can do, listen and tell me NO. I dont need them to tell me that. I know that myself. I just want someone to listen so that I wont go after the thing they said no to.
Haha, writing in gray. I can write it with crystal clear image and say its a fiction Im working on. But no, I only write what I know. And this can be shocking.
Im telling that now.
But, I would like a person who demands my time and attention. One that can pull my shirt down when Im reaching the top shelf. One that makes my exhaustion gone with a smile.
And definitely one that can send me back home after work. Today I walked home from the office. Hebat tak? Haha.
This year is the turn to celebrate in White House, Pekan, Pahang. 80 plus family members all bundled in one house! Havoc! As always, the morning of Eid will be a problematic day for all of us. There's not enough water for everyone to bathe. So this year my uncles installed a new pumping system. Everything was fine and dandy.....until the very morning itself. Alas! Still no water! So all the males in the family went to the mosque to shower and even there they had to compete with each other so that they can get ready early for Eid prayers.
All is good this year. I managed to give all my cousins duit raya. First salary for the family! InsyaAllah in future I can give more to more people.
It's time for the next phase. Time to payback all those hutang budi yang teramat banyak tak terbilang tapi sentiasa diingati. InsyaAllah one at a time.
Everyone, your girl has grown up.
And tomorrow at 7.15am, she reports for duty for her first job.
Please pray for the best for me. Amin.
Discombulate means confuse. Which I am right now because I was set to write about curiousity as suggested by Ema. Hers was the first reply I got. I actually wanted to tell you guys about Coca-Cola marketing strategy for Vanilla Coke when it was first introduced in 2002 or 2003. Their tagline was "Feed Your Curiosity"
I remember that night Kak Lina, Abang Ayis, Abang E and I went to KLCC to watch Gothika. When we entered the cinema there were a few people who looked busy and one was holding a flash card. In the dark. Can't recall if I actually manage to read what was written. Anyways, the advertisements and trailers started, followed by Vanilla Coke advert which ended with a red screen with words stating CHECK UNDER YOUR SEAT! i heard whispers and buzzing sound all around, i guess the audience were not entirely sure if they should do it. Maybe its the fear of looking stupid that stopped them. I didnt actually checked, i just brave myself to put my hand under the seat and I touched something cold and wet. They gave us a can of vanilla coke! That was a really cool marketing strategy. Gave me a lasting impact. Wonder why I never blog about it before.
Okay! I think I managed to confuse myself more now since I've been writing about Vanilla Coke rather than a story related to the word discombobulate. Ahhh I have the perfect thing story for this.
I am hopeless and most unreliable when it comes to directions. Seriously, I am a total failure at giving directions, reading maps/GPS and memorizing roads. In short, I SUCK! I live in Keramat. Just last night after a lepak session in Wangsa Maju, I told Syafiq to take a left turn at a junction to 'get home'. He said we should just go straight. Guess where we are heading? Back to Wangsa Maju. I can totally qualify as a dumb blond if people bleach my hair before asking for directions. Heh!
I hate giving directions and I feel so pressured if people expect me to give directions. I may know the place and what is near to it, but damn! I can never remember how to get there. I dream of joining Amazing Race or those treasure hunt challenge but I really should have a partner/team members who are patient and has a GPS like memory. I will only be great help in getting us disoriented from the course. And then we will all be discombobulated!
Eh so fun lah the word. Like bamboozled! Ooooh I wish I can actually play that game. FRIENDS made it sound so fun. Just so you know bamboozle is a synonym for discombobulate. Really!
YOU'VE BEEN BAMBOOZLED!
Sorry, just had to do it.
I feel my heart burdened
My arms wanting to tighten
Your hands bringing me closer
Closing in, sincere.
I feel a jumble of emotions flooding in.
For recently discovering you.
For not knowing you enough.
Feeling the warmth I shouldn't deserve.
As I hug you goodbye
I prepare for farewell
So long, until we meet again.
You entered my dreams. Its almost real. If I am not me, I would have your fingers entwined with mine. And decide what it means later.